From my friends on Facebook and Insta, I often receive the question … “Dada, what a wonderful life you have, I wish I was in your place. You are always happy, always smiling and radiate positivity, joy and hope. What is your secret??” I decided to write this article to answer the above question deliberately, and perhaps this is the most important thing I have ever written in my life. This has been written after lots of deliberation, introspection and personal journey through life.
What do you think is the WORLDS BEST KEPT SECRET?? Is it the Trump success story? The 9/11 conspiracy theory? The Kennedy murder mystery? Alien landing? El Dorado? Perhaps not. Because even if you knew those secrets, how will that help you in leading a positive, meaningful, happy and fulfilling life, which is the most important thing for any individual. What we want, and what we need is a Plan, a list of Things-To-Do, that’ll help us in achieving happiness, fulfillment and meaning in our rather mundane living. I am convinced that its True and Relevant, but mind you, it’s easier said than done. This is a recommended MUST READ for my friends and I take the responsibility in guarantying that you will be better of after studying and if you wish imbibing it. So, here is the secret.
PROFESSIONAL-COMPETENCE. Your profession is your identity and your food provider, you cannot ignore it at any stage in life.
- If a student, forget every distraction and study hard. Be a master of what is taught without any doubt in mind. They have their due relevance.
- Give all your energy and effort to settle into a good career. That is the single most important decision and maker of your life. Nothing (Biking, travelling, girls, fun, friends etc) is more important than a career at that age/ stage in life. If you miss that bus, you will be in trouble.
- In your professional life, always strive to improve and be the best in the skill-set. Always, always be involved in your work.
- Learn to prioritize your professional work, depending upon importance, effort and deadline. Always be punctual. Be in time; leave your workplace in time. Do not spend unnecessary hours in work/ office.
- Never ever mix your professional and personal life.
- Work with an uncluttered mind and on an uncluttered workspace.
- Work hard, but don’t ever get emotionally upset and personal over workplace politics, competition, gossip and results.
HEALTH. Another extremely important thing to be happy and fulfilled.
- Do not smoke tobacco. (I smoke and am not happy about it).
- If you drink alcohol, drink in moderation and socially only. Drink lots and lots of water.
- Eat all and as many types of food possible, but eat less in quantity.
- Exercise in any form 1 hour per day. Mix it well with aerobics, swimming, walking, jogging, yoga, competitive sports, gym on different days.
- Add 5-10 minutes of Breathing exercise and meditation on your daily routine.
- Once a year, get your comprehensive medical check-up done with specific importance to Blood pressure, Blood sugar and infection / allergy.
FRIENDS AND FAMILY. Nobody dies with the regret that he could work more, everyone feels that he should have spent more time with family and friends. So, things to do:-
- Choose your friends well, and then treasure your friends. Never ever be judgmental about friends.
- Plan and spend time with your own family, Help your wife in chores, do outdoor activities with your children, let them learn new ways to see the world. Wife and children only want one thing, not gifts- just quality time.
- Genuinely respect parents and elders. Do not be impolite to them. Look after their needs. Their blessing is priceless.
MONEY MATTERS. Yes, money matters. But the funny thing about money is that if you chase it, it’ll elude you. The secret of having good money always are :-
- Choose your career deliberately and well. If you chose to be a Government clerk, how can you crib that you don’t have a Porsche?
- Save a lot of money. Saving is much more important than daily spending. Only your saved money will let you live your dream; may it be biking, seeing the world or possession of a house, post retirement comfort, children’s settlement, medical contingencies etc.
- Don’t be too bothered about possession, be bothered about experience.
- Always and always avoid being in debt. Shun credit cards, personal loans etc, they are just traps you can’t get out of. Take a house loan if necessary (for tax benefits), otherwise just don’t buy what you can’t with your saved money.
- Have fixed short and long term goals, they make the hardship enjoyable.
HOBBIES. Though often ignored, do cultivate a hobby. Something which you genuinely enjoy doing.
- Be both serious and fun-loving about your hobby. If its not fun, why do it at all?
- Be ready to spend some money and quality personal time on your hobby, even at the cost of subtracting that from riff raff time and maybe family time.
MINDSPACE. A very deliberate issue to lead a happy contended life.
- Be honest and upright. Don’t accept nonsense. Don’t lie, steal or cheat.
- Study a lot. Learn, think, introspect. Be a man of wisdom, not just knowledge.
- Donate some money / time for the poor and the needy in the society regularly. You loose nothing, but they gain a lot, and you earn blessings.
- Be a person with a broad shoulder and a large heart. Don’t be bothered about small pettiness of stupid people, ignore them. Focus on the good of and for others, will keep you calm and centred.
- Be creative. Learn to something new, song, dance, language, bike maintenance, blogging, writing … whatever fancies you and pursue it.
- Enjoy the Social media, but don’t be emotionally dependent on it. Understand the shortfalls and trappings of social media and then use it well. Don’t forget, real friends and family, and not social media is your true support system.